Pregnancy is hard, even when you don’t have any kids, but when you have 5 already, it’s harder. I have to confess I have googled this exact title, just to see how other women with big broods deal with pregnancy, specifically the 1st trimester, and still keep up with all the stuff that needs doing with a big family. So, I have come up with a few suggestions, in case you are in the same boat as me, or in case you just have one kid and are pregnant, that’s hard too. Or maybe you don’t have any kids and are pregnant, but work full-time, also difficult.
1. Admit defeat. Don’t try to be Super Woman. Don’t try to do everything you did before you were nauseous all the time and so tired you can’t see straight. Just accept that house will not be as clean as it could be, dinner might not always get made, and you might forget something you would normally remember. I forgot to pick up my son from school the other day. Seriously. Just accept all this as your new normal, at least until you get out of the first trimester and start feeling a little more normal again. I have accepted that my kids are eating chicken nuggets or cereal for dinner, at least I fed them. I have accepted they might not have clean laundry for school the next day, wearing what you wore the day before never killed anyone. Well, maybe, but it will be okay. I have accepted that my house is not up to par with how it usually is, oh well, I will clean it this summer when I feel better.
2. Ask for help. Particularly if you are one of those woman who has REALLY bad morning sickness. The kind where you throw up multiple times a day and nothing helps you feel better. I know some women who have been hospitalized for this. It’s serious stuff. I am so blessed to not be in that group, but if you are, please ask for help. Those of us who are not visiting the porcelain god all day everyday, want to help. I cannot imagine how hard that must be. I wouldn’t have 6 kids if I had it that bad, I will tell you. If you are blessed like me to not have it as bad as those women, count your blessings. When I am lying on the sofa just trying to make it through the day, I remember that I am not in the hospital because I am so sick and dehydrated, and I realize my situation is not that bad.
3. Get your kids and husband to do their part. Don’t be a martyr. Ask them to clean up something or help with dinner. My kids are 11, 10, 7, 4 and 3 right now and they can do a lot. So, I lean on them. I have told them mommy doesn’t feel good and they are going to have to help out more than normal. And most of the time they do, willingly. What I have learned, especially with boys and husbands, is that they cannot see what needs to be done. So, instead of getting frustrated that 5 people have now walked by the same mess and done nothing about it while you stare at it from the sofa, just ask them to do it.
4. Play the pregnancy card. When I forgot something or just fail to do something I just tell people, “sorry, I’m pregnant”. It sounds obnoxious, I would imagine at times, but it’s the truth. Keeping up with stuff for five kids and all that while pregnant is just hard, and that is my way of cutting myself some slack.
5. Remember this is all for a good reason. At the end of nine months, God willing, you will bring home a precious baby and all this sickness and tiredness and crankiness will be worth it. Keep your eye on the prize and take one day at a time. Try to keep a good attitude, I know easier said that done with raging pregnancy hormones, but it will make you feel better if you are positive rather than negative. It will get better.