Daddy daughter dances, commercials with dad’s giving their daughters presents and songs about the special bond between dads and daughters really used to make me want to hurl. Actually they just made me sad and angry. Father’s day was the worst day ever, especially since it comes right after my birthday. I wanted nothing to do with the father/daughter thing because I didn’t have it. My parent’s divorced when I was young, something I explored in my post from yesterday. So, my dad just wasn’t around when I was growing up. It hurt me deeply but also drove me to want something better for my kids.
I always thought we would have a daughter. My husband has five sisters so it seemed logical to me that we would have a girl right off. Our first son was born, and I thought “well, good, Glenn will have his son, and I am sure the next one will be a girl”. Four boys later, I determined we were physically unable to have girls. lol So, we adopted one. Our daughter came home two weeks ago from her home country. She is 11 and we are thrilled to have a daughter. It’s different from having boys. I knew it would be because I have nieces and I know that girls are different even as infants, but having one living with you is a whole other thing. She is dramatic and an attention hog, but only when she feels like it. Moody and a princess. She loves things that sparkle and purses. When they introduced her in church last week she stood up, smiled and waved like a beauty queen. I laughed. She is different.
I could tell when I first saw video of my husband meeting her for the first time that she stole his heart right away. He adores her and she him. I will admit that took a little getting used to. I was used to being the queen of my house, I now have competition. Her brothers are fiercely protective and love her already. It amazes me that even they would treat her differently having never lived with a girl, other than mom. Even my relationship with her is different from mine with our boys. I can’t really explain it to you, but it just is.
The best thing about it and one of the reasons I wanted a daughter is to watch my husband be the father I always wanted. It is healing for me. It is healing to watch this little girl who had no parents for the first 11 years of her life, now have a dad who treats her as a princess. She is not spoiled, we do have rules, but we want to show her how valuable she is. I knew Glenn would do an amazing job with a daughter, and when we were first discussing adopting a little girl he was really indifferent about it all. He had never really though about wanting a girl, I am sure he would say differently now. It’s a wonderful picture of how much God loves us. He adores and cherishes us, even though we aren’t perfect. My husband is so patient with her, even more so than I am at 4 am when she is up and wants attention. He sleeps in the floor in her room from 3-6am every morning. I asked him if it bothered him and he said, “no” like it was no big deal. It’s amazing to me. Even though our daughter has special needs, and will never be “normal”, she won’t get married and have grandkids for us, but we still love her for who she is. We like the fact hat she will always needs us. She is our precious daughter, the one we had prayed for for years and we finally have her home.
Ahhh…daughters…the best is yet to come. Just know the challenges seem never-ending, but it’s all worth it. Watching them grow into young ladies will make you cherish them and challenge you all at once. I believe great things for Elizabeth and for your relationship with her.